welcome to the wonderland, be nice and kind, and I won't bite
Author : Faciikan
Main Cast : Minho and Sohee of Wonder Girls
Support Cast : -none-
Length : -ficlet-
Genre : Song fiction (Wonder Girls’ “Girlfriend” and Taylor Swift’s “I Almost Do”; Romance; Angst
Rating : General
Summary : And for the rest of the night they both cried rivers of tears.
A.N : This was actually inspired by Wonder Girls’ Ye-eun story in Strong Heart. I muddled it up with my guilty pleasure—which is shipping Minho and Sohee although I am thinking that no one does the same.
December 9th 2012—10.50PM
I regret it.
You must have been satisfied when you hear it. Those three words must have been the sentence that you currently long the most. I know. But I can’t say it, not now not ever.
I must have been the dumbest living creature in this world because I did let you slipped of my grip. You were—and still—the most precious person that I treasured, and I just let you go.
I know I was being stupid. I know it all. I am not sensible that’s why we had that argument. I kept thinking that was your fault, because the shell that you wore was so perfect. You were that kind of gentleman who would put his partner first and put your ego aside. You did it well so that made me not thinking about you. That made me so selfish so I didn’t put even a single care to you. That kind of thoughts came across. But you are simply not. Your gentlemanly was only a shell indeed; inside you is a boy who needs affection from your loved one. I finally came to my senses, it was my entire fault and I sincerely admit it.
So tonight I poured a glass of Pinot Noir. I just want to have a glass but every single time your name came across my stone head, I just felt like wanting a huge gulp of it.
After writing this, I want to sit in the dry bath-up and try to call you. I don’t have the confidence of you will pick the call up, but at least I try. That doesn’t mean I want to reconcile or whatsoever. I will call you because I simply miss your beautiful voice.
December 9th 2012—11.00PM
What are you doing? I hardly guess you’re sitting by the window, with your favorite Russian Caravan enjoying the city, or; you are probably dreaming, curled up like a fetus on your bed.
From I suppose an hour ago, I’ve been staring at my phone, waiting for at least a message. Most of the people who have my contact send me a congratulatory message, congratulating my birthday. There was a pile of it, even people I don’t even know the existence gave me presents today. So many of it, but none was from you.
I just wondered if you have moved on already. You have, most likely. Considering your coldness and sensibility, I can assume you have. I want to cry because of that thought. But I am happy if you have, because you can forget me. But ironically I wish you haven’t. I am a strange guy, indeed.
That night, when we argued, every single word you said was perfectly recorded by this retarded brain of mine. How you said, “couldn’t you just understand?” keeps tearing me apart whenever that line come to my senses. I was thinking which part of me that doesn’t understand you. I understood you head to toe. But no I didn’t. Now I come to my consciousness that I don’t understand you at all.
For these past weeks, I’ve been living in hardship; the hardship of not missing you. I tried my best but I just couldn’t. Every single second I went I missed you. I just can’t help to not checking my phone; I just can’t help to not looking your phone number just to stare at it and ended up with my ego at the edge. I want to call you but my ego won’t let me. I apologize for being a human, not an angel as you wished.
If this night passed without a single thing about you, then I would most probably being on hardship again. It’s 11.30PM now, and how I pathetically still waiting for something from you.
With the very last strength I have,
Sohee sat in the bath-up. Her flushed cheek and her teary eyes didn’t manage to pull off her beauty. She had been staring at her phone for at least twenty minutes. The screen showed a name and a number. All belonged to one man, Choi Minho. There was an emotion war going in her whether to call or not to call the man she missed so much.
There was so much “what ifs” going inside her. The one worried her most was “what if Minho hates me?”
Finally, with trembling fingers she touched to green button, indicating she was actually calling Minho. She didn’t even have to hear Yoo Young-jin’s voice—which was the ringtone of Minho’s—because Minho picked it up right away.
“Hello?” She hesitated.
“I am here.” Minho answered the call.
Sohee inhaled more air than she usually breathes, “okay.”
Silence came and it was really awkward. Sohee gathered the last bit of her courage and said, “We haven’t had a proper break-up.”
Minho was puzzled. He sincerely expected Sohee to just say a professional singer-to-singer congratulatory but that—what she just said—was totally beyond his wildest anticipation. “I am listening,” he said after awhile.
“So, I,” she paused overcoming sobs, “I just want to say that, let’s break up and live our life separated. No matter what our life would turn out, I earnestly wish that you will live it well.”
Minho cried in silence—like really crying. He let the diamond-like water streamed down his angelic face. Neither of them cut the line and somehow the silence was not so bad. Both Minho and Sohee was crying a river, both of them regretting and both of them want to hug each other.
Finally Minho came to his senses. He almost broke his own cell phone to release his sentiment, “Sou, are you still there?”
Sohee’s heart skipped a beat. Minho called her with the pet name that he gave. Miraculously she did whisper a “yes” to Minho.
“I frankly hope the same. But I cannot continue this conversation. The girl I am meeting, she’s on the line so,”
Sohee cut him off, “I see. I am hanging up now. Good night, Minho-ssi.” And she really did end the call, leaving both of them breathless, suffocated by the pain.
Minho lied. There was no other girl, there was no call. It was just a trick. And that left him a pain. The truth of him hurting Sohee was that pain. She must had been feeling humiliated by his words.
And for the rest of the night they both cried rivers of tears.
P.S. : So in Strong Heart Ye-eun told that she wrote the song Girlfriend based on her experience and that really touched me. The story was almost the same, they didn’t have proper break up so Ye-eun called him. But her ex said that he was with another woman and Ye-eun thought “dude, that escalated quickly” considering it was only couple weeks after their break up.
P.P.S. : About “I Almost Do” I somehow had an emotional bond with that song, so it became my inspiration for Minho’s perspective. And, shoot! I finally made my first angst—even it’s a crappy master piece *face palm*
P.P.P.S. : What the hell is up with this P.S? So, I finished the Bar Exam! So I can write more and attempting on writing in Indonesian—geez, it is freaking hard. Anyway—sorry for the long P.S. — happy reading!